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Rosemary, thank your for your kind words. I appreciate them very much. I can tell you from experience that teachers at all levels of life love to hear from students whom they have taught or mentored. I hope you will take the time to tell other important teachers in your life what they did for you, as well.

I particularly loved teaching in the Community College environment because I found myself in an enviable position to help students travel some of life's rocky roads through my 'psychology for living' classes. Most community college students cannot afford to seek out family counseling, and what a bonus that the educational system could offer young adults such an opportunity to think out loud about their many options (and difficulties) in life – in an atmosphere of learning and inquiry.

I always encourage students to seek out the best professors through word of mouth. Talk to your fellow students, find out WHO is inspiring and who isn't before you take their classes. Take courses from the inspiring professors and let them fill you up with their energy and passion for the things that move them. For school is NOT all math and technical know-how, and we have to learn to live in harmony with others first, then forge careers for ourselves.

I remember once offering a year-long colloquim in family relationships to all rising seniors in a local high school. I wanted to be sure that they graduated with some significant relationship skills, not just with math and language skills. My offer was turned down because the school 'already offered that kind of thing' in its health curriculum. I THINK NOT. In fact, I know not...schools are driven by standarized curriculums that fit into tight budgetary spaces, even though the colloquium that I was offering was (1) free and (2) it had only the requirement that all rising seniors take it before graduating that year. So I moved over to the Community College system to see what I do there to help students navigate the terrible relationship turbulence around them.

And that was where I enountered Rosemary, in one of those night classes of mine...someone who was older than the rest, but not by THAT much in some cases; but certainly she was tired looking and obviously scared to death of what was to come. She had no confidence in herself, no encouraging others around her, and she had nothing to pin her hopes on except possibly a passing grade if she studied hard enough despite having three small children and a horrible marriage to manage. But I looked into those tired eyes and I saw a person with huge passions and great ambitions. And that was the kind of 'stuff' that made me always come back for more, semester and after semester. The dialogues we had in those classes were profound and sometimes life-changing, and they reverberated beyond the walls of the buildings that we occupied.

This is what education is all about, isn't it?

Psychology is one of the 'soft' sciences, meaning, unlike mathematics or engineering where hard numbers can be crunched' and combined, psychology is a relative field of study. You can't Chi Square feelings no matter how hard you try! Feelings and anxieties and relationship concerns defy standardization. They do lend themselves to relationship patterning if only one has a language to decipher those patterns with...which is the language of SYSTEMS THINKING.

Dr. Murray Bowen of Georgetown was my mentor. I have always tried to pass along the same kind of mentoring process to my own students along the way.

According to a systems way of thinking, you are what you are from the trek you have taken through life to date. If your intimate relationship network has been encouraging, you will be an encouraged young adult with aspirations. If that network has been abusive or destructive, you will feel abused and perhaps even act out destructiveness in your interactions with others, and your aspirations will be limited at best.

I just wish our educational system was more tuned into such things, and brave enough to say NO to Standards of Learning (SOL's) that inhibit good teachers and good learning processes that take into account where each student is coming from, not just intellectually, but personally.

Perhaps your children, Rosemary, will help lead the way with your encouragement and good parenting! YOU GO, GIRL!

The Moon Flower (Ipomoea alba) blooms only in the evening